GUEST BLOG: 'bethenny' eps 3&4

Thanks again to @Acute_Tweement!!!! Xo

_______________

Bethenny’s talk show airs episode 3 on June 13, 2012 with her signature song“Calling all my girls”

Bethenny is shown preparing to walk out to her audience. She hugs a producer before being directed by another to move on out for show time! The crowd greets her with loud cheers as she dances and prances onto the stage.
She is cheerful and happy wearing a white blazer over a coral colored sequined shirt and jeans. She opens up saying,
“How crazy is this!? This is still so crazy. It’s not like there’s a guide book, it’s not like there’s hand book. The producers just throw you out there like you’re in the wild!”

Hmmm..well you did have Scary Island Survivor written on your resume…haha

She brings up her how glamorous her life is now that she moved to LA for her very own talk show produced by Ellen. She and Jason were ready for the chill life of the West Coast but a full flea infestation halted those plans temporarily. Poor Cookie. She’s the biggest victim in this scenario. Her motto is: She is to eat and not be eaten…haha

Bethenny has a candid camera confessional booth that is dubbed “Frankly Speaking”. An audience member confesses on camera that she would sleep with someone for financial gain. She is a single mother and times are tough! 20 people in the audience agree with her. Bethenny says they are “Shameful and slutty without morals, like herslelf.” Hey…she wrote a book about a place of YES and gong for yours. J
“She continues by saying, “There is no judgment here…I just want to know…I just want to talk about it”.

Bethenny introduces her all girl panel to further discuss this topic.
Ali Fedotowski, Tiffany Haddish, and Jody Fletcher.
The ladies walk out onto the stage in assorted colors like a pretty bouquet…red, pink, and green dresses.

Ali tells us she would not sleep with anyone for financial gain because she wants to set a good example for any children she has in the future…noble…blah blah….boring..ha

Tiffany says “YES!”…interesting

Jody says: “Yes. You do it for no reasons some times”…brilliant!

Bethenny points out that Women’s Health Magazine reported that women hit their daily sexual peek at 11:00PM. Hmmm. Interesting. I need to research what this sexual peek feels like…if I could only stay up to 11:00PM…damn. HA!

Jody chimes in, “Yeah…If you’re drunk!”

Tiffany shares that it’s better for her to wait until the morning…she is well rested and marinated through the night and peeks when the sun comes up. We have to agree with her. Night time sex can be very stale and flavorless without time to marinate the slab of meat.

Relationship agreements are the next topic. Bethenny wants to talk about Mark Zuckerberg’s agreement with his new wife, Priscilla, to spend 100 minutes per week together free of work or phones….say what???
She is interrupted by a producer signaling that it’s time for a commercial break. This is hilarious how that happens casually on her show. It’s like being with friends talking, laughing and then interrupted by hubby saying he needs help in the kitchen. HA!

After the break they further discuss relationship agreements for quality couple time. Bethenny says she does not need to work out a time frame for torturing Jason. She just does it all day with out a contract. Jody interjects that Jason probably needs a contract for 100 minutes away from Bethenny per week. HA HA HA!!! Funny ;-)

There are also social media contracts in relationships. Just another sign of our time. These keep your significant other from releasing too much information thru social media’s like Twitter or Facebook. Jason probably has one of these since he’s married to the Queen of TMI. Iron clad. J

Other couples require that they each approve of their mates friendships on Facebook. No exes or nemesis are to be accepted. Ali admits that she is friends with all of her exes on Facebook…including Roberto.
Bethenny does not think that Jason would appreciate her accepting friendships of exes on Facebook…but she does have over 900,000 followers on Twitter. A couple of those are bound to be an ex or a 1 night stand. HA!

An audience member suggests having a combined Facebook account and keeping it open without secrecy out of respect to their partner. She believes that exes are exes for a reason and it should end at that. Bethenny wonders if it is worth losing a good friendship over a jealous spouse. The audience member retorts that you may lose a friend but you gain a husband. WOW! Love that! You go girl!

Bethenny says that she is currently disagreeing with herself on this matter. :-D
2 voices in her head can arm wrestle over this during the next break. Ha

Kate Walsh arrives on stage and she looks AAAAHHHmazing! Flawless. Wearing a short-short blue dress that has slits on the sleeves. Her legs are tan and glowing…I scratch one white prickly leg of mine in embarrassment while watching this. Ugh!

Bethenny is obsessed with Kate getting to kiss Taye Diggs on her show Private Practice every day and feels NOTHING. Nada. Okay. We don’t understand this either. We conclude that she must be a cold heartless bitch or an android from outer space. HAHAHA
Kate reveals that she is leaving Private Private after 8 years! WOW! She’s bound to go through Taye Diggs withdrawal after this for sure! We see convulsions, cold sweats, the works.

She has a fragrance line that she exclusively owns called Boyfriend and Billionaire. Bethenny shows them off and tells us how great they smell. We must check it out! Could be used as an anti crotch rot serum when traveling with my hubby. HA!

Moving on to other questions to audience members and the general girly public. Would you ever:

• Sleep with a man who slept with another man just once?
• Would you ever sleep with your ex?
• Would you ever send a nude photo to your partner?

Jason informs Bethenny that he has sexted her a photo of his family jewels and she had NO CLUE! Wait…where did that end up? Maybe it’s just a frequent occurrence with her. I’ve sexted pictures of my balls to her every week for 3 years. Good luck with that Jason. HA

The show ends with an extreme break up story involving a couple who were engaged and the female called it quits and wiped out a joint bank account after they were already paying for preparations of their wedding. Steven Silverstein is suing Kendra Platt-Lee for his money back and damages done to his achey breaky heart. Sad situation. Bet she won’t do that again.

Stephen is single, good looking, has a job and is broken hearted. He’s wounded prey just waiting for an armed hunter. Bethenny says she can help him out. The ladies will find him adorable and irresistible.
“It’s like taking a puppy to the park!”

The Queen of TMI signs out!

-------------------------

Bethenny’s talk show airs episode 4 on June 14, 2012 with her signature song “Calling all my girls”
I answer the call by anchoring my ass to the couch.
Coincidently this episode’s topics focuses mostly on butts! Heheehee!

Bethenny starts out standing amongst the audience looking GORGEOUS in a black mini dress with white polka dots. Her hair is down, wavy and parted down the center. This frames her face perfectly! LOVE!
My girl is dancing…shaking her booty booster and shimmying to the music.

She opens this show by discussing how often she is asked about her business successes and tips on how to make it in the world as an entrepreneur. We all know Bethenny worked her “ass” off to make it! She delivered cookies in a $500 jalopy truck with a cracked windshield, cried alone in her bakery that was falling under, sold pashmina wearing it from head to toe. Yep. Pashmina baseball cap, shirt, skirt, thong, flip flops…she’s still trying to figure out how this business didn’t go global. Ha!
She finally hit it big with Skinny Girl Margarita and Cocktails. She believed this was an idea that would be accepted, demanded, and loved by the public and she was right!
Before the “little cocktail that could” was able to chug with the big trains on the track…Bethenny heard the word NO often. Thankfully she never gave up trying. She knows it pays big to come from a place of yes. She is paying it forward now and seeking out female business entrepreneurs and inventors of new ideas. She would like to bring them public awareness and also invest her own Skinny Girl money in the best ones! That’s AWESOME!

She had 2 ladies on this show who both had clever ideas.
1.) Amy James from Prosepect, Texas

Her invention was the Shutter Hugger. A stuffed animal that surrounds a cameral lens to get your child’s attention and look directly at the camera! Genius and simple!

2. Carrie Goodman from Chicago, Illinois

Her invention was the world’s first fully expandable rings for the finger! Very smart. We all know our weight fluctuates from time to time…swelling from too much MSG, pregnancy, using our middle finger too often on Monday mornings….ha
This took her a year to design. WOW!

Bethenny was very excited talking to these ladies about business and what their next steps should be for success and protecting their rights with patents. I marveled at how Bethenny started waving her arms, talking fast and thinking out loud! She loves this stuff!

Cheryl Burke was the next guest. We all know her from Dancing with the Stars. She arrives wearing a beautiful red dress and holding 2 GIGANTIC sized margaritas! HA!

She sits on Bethenny’s couch and they discuss DWTS, sexting, butts, sex and lack there of…
Cheryl recently reconnected with her estranged father who lives in Thailand. He was involved in a bad car accident this past December and she reached out to him and is glad she did. They stay in touch through email now.

Next topic…Butts…we are a society that is very into butts now. Nicki Minaj, Jennifer Lopez, Kim Kardashian, Coco…
“Butts with bounce are in this Summer!” says Bethenny.

3 audience members need butt beautifying and doo overs. Bethenny takes them to the Butt Factory on her stage and gives them various shape wear to help “assentuate” their “assets” better.

Fast forward….fast forward…..to CoCo’s appearance!!! OMG! The most googled butt for a reason! That ass deserves it’s own temple for worship. Bethenny greets her by squeezing her tushy and saying, “I get it”
Yep. It’s real.

CoCo is beautiful and curvaceous. Her lovely lady bumps are in all the right spots. That butt should be studied in a laboratory. Perhaps bottled for others…another business idea for Bethenny. HA!

Ed, an executive producer who has not left the sound booth for 19 years, emerges on stage to meet his long time crush, CoCo.
His mission….He places a coaster on her ass and Bethenny puts a glass on top of the coaster. She then pours herself a cocktail from a Skinny Mini bottle….all on CoCo’s gluteus maximus. Hey… There was enough room for 2…HA HA HA!!!!
This is spank bank gold for Ed! He’s loaded for months!


Moving along…a work out guru named Dizzy Gold (or something like that) tries to demonstrate exercise techniques with CoCo in full exercise attire…tights, sports tank, and wearing high heels!!!! I have no idea what Dizzy is talking about. I am hypnotized by CoCo. I know Ice T is on some Beta Blockers. HOLY SHIT BALLS! She’s hot. How does she not have her own show? OH SHE DOES!!! It’s called CoCo’s World and it’s on E. ….Ed is submitting his resume now…

Audience members get on stage and get involved in a move called the Booty Bounce. I still can ONLY SEE COCO!
They get down and do some crazy lunging exercises and Coco keeps her heels on while Bethenny kicks hers off saying at CoCo”This one is another level”. She’s right. Wait?? What was Bethenny just saying…I can only see CoCo. Someone slap me! (whack) Thank you to my 3 year old for slapping me, breaking the hypnosis and bringing me back to reality. Time to make lunch.

Oh yeah. The 3 audience members with butt doo overs return to show off their new tooshy makeovers. There are improvements. But… it’s still not even close to CoCo’s coccyx. Bummer! HA HA HA!

Bowing down to the Queen of TMI as she signs out!




Acute_Tweetment….sharing my opinions that are Veryfried in Writing…